What is being asked of us?
How are you holding up?
This year has been a storm. The kind that doesn't just pass through—it reshapes the landscape. It has been a year since the storm (Hurricane Helene) came through Western North Carolina and did just that. The intensity of global events, relational tensions, and the deeper fatigue of holding so much has left many of us feeling drained and overstimulated. And if you're someone who feels deeply, who stays attuned, who carries emotional labor for yourself and others—you’ve likely felt tired down to your bones.
And while there is a stripping away and a vulnerability with this process, there is also a strength that is born.
There’s a kind of wisdom that emerges in these thresholds—seasonal, emotional, existential. When the rising roar gets so loud outside, I’m pulled toward the quieter but much more powerful work of returning to myself. Not just for comfort, though that is so very important—but as a form of inner leadership. Not as a retreat, but as a recalibration in the process of being reborn.
Another name for this inner leadership—trust.
Building Trust in Ourselves: A Slow and Sacred Process
Self-trust is not a switch we flip. It’s not found in affirmations or acting like you’ve got it all together. It’s not even the awareness of our feelings or needs. It’s a relationship we build—over time, through consistency, honesty, and deep listening.
It starts when we choose to stop abandoning ourselves in moments of overwhelm, and take the time to listen to each part of us. It grows every time we validate our own experience, and look for ways to integrate and re-align to our values and our purpose. It strengthens when we stop pushing ourselves to be perfect and instead pause to listen:
What do I already know?
What do I think I know, but actually I don’t.
And what do I not yet know, but I am finding out?
Trust is built when we keep returning to our own self—even the messy, scared, lost, or uncertain parts. Trust is build when we choose to step past shame and do the thing anyway, trusting that we will be ok no matter the outcome.
And it’s in those moments of inward turning that we begin to hear all the parts of ourselves—not just the polished or high-functioning ones, but the quiet ones, the scared ones, the ones we learned to push aside. Listening to these parts isn’t a detour. It’s the way forward.
Letting the Whole Self Speak
Every one of us carries a constellation of inner voices: the child who wants to be seen, the protector who fears collapse, the achiever who needs to get it right, the dreamer who wants more beauty and freedom. These parts aren't problems to fix—they’re sacred aspects of your psyche. They all have needs, stories, fears, and longings. And each one holds a key to your deeper wholeness.
When we listen—really listen—to all of them, we begin to soften. The internal tension eases. We stop fighting ourselves. And something else begins to emerge. We start to hear and feel a central part of ourselves that can contain the other. An inner mother, perhaps.
That “something else” is what I call the Self—the part of us that isn’t reactive, afraid, or split. It’s not just another voice in the system. It’s the clear, compassionate center that knows how to lead with integrity, calm, and courage.
Meeting the Self
There’s a part of you—always present, even if quiet—that knows how to lead with wisdom. This part isn’t trying to prove anything. It isn’t scrambling to please, blame, fix, or achieve. It simply knows what’s aligned. What matters. What’s true.
This is the part that honors your natural rhythm. That knows rest is not laziness, but right timing. That seeks not only survival or success, but satisfaction. That values connection over performance, truth over image.
This Self doesn’t get swayed by the hurt, or the outrage. It doesn’t believe every feeling you have as truth. When we are listening to this Self, we make our way towards our responsibility and structure; we know how to bring in pleasure and connection; we can open up to self-awareness and inner freedom—and TRUST that it all serves something deeper: the wise, steady journey with a purpose.
This purpose may be as simple and yet profound as:
Telling the truth kindly
Saying no without guilt
Taking care of your body
Holding more than one truth
Creating beauty for its own sake
Choosing connection instead of control
Letting go of roles that no longer serve you
What This Moment Might Be Asking Of Us
We live in a time that rewards speed, output, and certainty. But I believe this season—this year, even—is calling for something else.
It’s asking us to slow down.
To deepen.
To reconnect with the compass inside.
To stop performing your way through life and start living from the inside out.
Because no matter what chaos is unfolding around us, we still get to choose how we meet it. And I find that the best way for me to feel more peace and stability in my life, is to have this Self that I trust. Remember, we have the capacity to turn toward ourselves, to choose compassion over shame/blame, presence over anxiety, love over fear.
And from that place—when Self is leading—we remember we’re not powerless. Quite far from it, actually! We’re not alone. We’re not broken.
We’re in process.
We’re in rhythm.
We’re in the very human work of becoming whole.
So if you’re asking yourself, what is being asked of us in these times?—maybe it’s a good time to stop trying so hard. To soften. To listen inward. To rebuild trust with your own nervous system, your own knowing, your own Self.
And let that trust, not urgency, be what moves you.
With care and gratitude,
Mallika
